Kissing and No Telling

Nowadays, it's cringe-worthy when you see a relationship crash and burn and the mudslinging takes to social media.  I don't need to know you hope your ex gets hit by a car or that your ex had night tremors and would wake up screaming and you're now calling them a little bitch. Or that your girl likes a certain position in bed. Or that they once did something strange for a little bit of change. There are certain things that should just stay between you.  

Hmmm, so NOW he's corny.  He wasn't when you were together...oh ok!

Smear campaigns are wack.  Don't be that person who thought it was so cute when he/she wore that jacket and then when you break up, that jacket is terrible.  Nope, that jacket is still fly, you're a little bitter now. And that's fine, you can be upset and mad and bitter about the demise of this relationship but don't go out on these streets screaming about how lame your ex is.

YOU dated them, so you cosigned the lameness. Stop.

I applaud those couples who break up and you have to be within their inner circle to find out. I had to ask a friend recently if she dissolved her marriage and that was because of an innocuous post I saw on FB. Just something that made me say "hmmm" and instead of commenting, I texted her because I am also friends with her ex so I wanted to make sure I wasn't committing any faux pas.  When I got the confirmation, I literally slow clapped at my phone.  That's the way to do it! Good for ya'll!  I mean, I know there will be screaming matches and emotional fights but keep that laundry in your basket. 

Did you ever really love them? 

 I'm really good at keeping secrets.  All secrets. The guys I've dated have confided in me.  Confided over dinners, drunken nights, Sundays at dawn and Wednesdays at 3am.  The times when it gets really real.  But when our time together ended, the secrets stayed with me.  You shouldn't emotionally eviscerate someone just because you're not together anymore.  I can hardly remember how their lips felt on mine, but when it comes to what was said in confidence; my lips are sealed.  Unless it something like abuse, then yes, tell EVERYONE because at that point it's a public service announcement. Warn everyone against this scumbag (male or female!)

If we dated, there was love exchanged.  Maybe we weren't IN love with each other but there was love there.  I'll always have love for the good memories and I'll learn from the bad ones.

However, full disclosure: my bestie may hear about how you cried during a chick flick, how you wanted to be held after you had a fight with your mom and how you're terrible at math...like really BAD.  All of that is going to come out when the wine is flowing.  You know, the little stuff.  :) 

xoSquared

PS. Has your ex ever taken to the web to slander you and ended up looking crazy?  It happened to me -- Well the ex of my ex needed a straight jacket when I came into the picture but now that I'm an ex as well...I get it.  Some people do bring the crazy out of you, but that's for another time :O)

It's a Birfday!

I want to give a bday shout out to a Square who is out here getting her LIFE!

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Cheekbones for Daaaayyysss!!

Ms. Vanessa is slaying on a daily.  I met Vanessa about four years ago through Yelp.  Yep...Yelp. I was looking for a dance class to rev up the workout routine and came across this Yelp review that had a grainy video up of people in a mirrored room dancing to Mariah's "Heartbreaker" and Bey's "Crazy In Love", with an instructor screaming out "Work! YAASSS! Live that moment!"  I said, yup this is for me.  

I went the next week and signed up, pretty nervous about being in a new space with new people, being the new kid is hard when yo see everyone is already talking to each other.  Then bursts in (Kool-aid style)  this neon teen dream, b-boy, fly-girl.  

It was like Lisa Frank and MTV's The Grind had a baby! She smiled, asked my name and gave me a hug.  I've been living ever since!

What makes Vanessa a special square to me, is the fact she saw the market was lacking and created something to fill the void.  She's constantly working to get her brand out there. She's a hustler.  She gets down on herself at times, just like all of us, but she straps on her Reeboks, hikes up her spandex and goes to WERK.  She is ALWAYS striving to get in where she fits in and makes a dollar out of 15 cents. 

LIVING!

In her class, you forget about the outside world and just "LIVE THAT MOMENT!"

You have to surround yourself with people who make you feel good.  People who push you to be a better person.  Vanessa has given me the opportunity to do something that makes me feel so good about myself and frankly, others.  After a tough week, her class gets me through!  I love her because she teaches others to love themselves.

Your squad needs to have people who support you and your endeavors and people who can appreciate a good photo op.  So for her birthday, I send V all the love and support for a beautiful year to come!! Oh and she will be performing at the MOMA at 2pm today....like a boss!

Happy Birthday Fly-Girl!

This girl has got me gigging out here in these streets!! 

xoSquared