secrets

Kissing and No Telling

Nowadays, it's cringe-worthy when you see a relationship crash and burn and the mudslinging takes to social media.  I don't need to know you hope your ex gets hit by a car or that your ex had night tremors and would wake up screaming and you're now calling them a little bitch. Or that your girl likes a certain position in bed. Or that they once did something strange for a little bit of change. There are certain things that should just stay between you.  

Hmmm, so NOW he's corny.  He wasn't when you were together...oh ok!

Hmmm, so NOW he's corny.  He wasn't when you were together...oh ok!

Smear campaigns are wack.  Don't be that person who thought it was so cute when he/she wore that jacket and then when you break up, that jacket is terrible.  Nope, that jacket is still fly, you're a little bitter now. And that's fine, you can be upset and mad and bitter about the demise of this relationship but don't go out on these streets screaming about how lame your ex is.

YOU dated them, so you cosigned the lameness. Stop.

I applaud those couples who break up and you have to be within their inner circle to find out. I had to ask a friend recently if she dissolved her marriage and that was because of an innocuous post I saw on FB. Just something that made me say "hmmm" and instead of commenting, I texted her because I am also friends with her ex so I wanted to make sure I wasn't committing any faux pas.  When I got the confirmation, I literally slow clapped at my phone.  That's the way to do it! Good for ya'll!  I mean, I know there will be screaming matches and emotional fights but keep that laundry in your basket. 

Did you ever really love them? 

Did you ever really love them? 

 I'm really good at keeping secrets.  All secrets. The guys I've dated have confided in me.  Confided over dinners, drunken nights, Sundays at dawn and Wednesdays at 3am.  The times when it gets really real.  But when our time together ended, the secrets stayed with me.  You shouldn't emotionally eviscerate someone just because you're not together anymore.  I can hardly remember how their lips felt on mine, but when it comes to what was said in confidence; my lips are sealed.  Unless it something like abuse, then yes, tell EVERYONE because at that point it's a public service announcement. Warn everyone against this scumbag (male or female!)

If we dated, there was love exchanged.  Maybe we weren't IN love with each other but there was love there.  I'll always have love for the good memories and I'll learn from the bad ones.

However, full disclosure: my bestie may hear about how you cried during a chick flick, how you wanted to be held after you had a fight with your mom and how you're terrible at math...like really BAD.  All of that is going to come out when the wine is flowing.  You know, the little stuff.  :) 

xoSquared

PS. Has your ex ever taken to the web to slander you and ended up looking crazy?  It happened to me -- Well the ex of my ex needed a straight jacket when I came into the picture but now that I'm an ex as well...I get it.  Some people do bring the crazy out of you, but that's for another time :O)