Find yourself a lover. A person who loves you. Who engages every part of you. Your body, your mind your, spirit. All of it because it's is fun AF.
it's so much better when it's fun!
Notice how I didn't say boyfriend or girlfriend or anything like that. I said a lover (read: luvah) that when you two are together; You are TOGETHER and it doesn't feel weird or constricting or labeled. It's just you enjoying each other's company, doing whatever comes naturally and letting it happen. You're not thinking about "what it looks like" or what it means; you're just present in the moment. Enjoying each other.
It's so much more than physical. Your minds need to be right. They need to gel. You need it to be someone that puts you at ease and doesn't make you feel weird. A lover won't grumble or lash out if for some reason y'all can't get down. They won't pout if your body isn't responsive. In fact they'll hold you closer. They will enjoy the quiet moments along with the turn ups. Every date won't be flowers and champagne. Maybe it's just a bad movie and good ice cream.
There needs to be an openness and honesty. You have to open yourself up to the fact that this is all it may be. Maybe you're not ready for a relationship. Maybe the other person isn't. You can't force it. You have to just enjoy it.
Lovers used to be so nice to each other. They respected one another; nowadays it just seem like a lot of machinations for a little make out sesh. Who's texting first? Who was the last to call? She doesn't get the good night text, she's not my girl. He doesn't get the good morning text! That's not my man." I mean...really? All of this seems so stressful. A lot of time is wasted on creating a hierarchy, to me. Just do what you like when you're interested in a person. If it's reciprocated...great!! If not, you know that's not the lover for you because if someone is dry to your communication they need a person who is just as dry. That's not a match for you.
Also, learn the difference between some who gets you wet and someone who turns you on.
There is a BIG difference. HUGE!! One action can happen without your permission. Ask a guy who gets a boner at an inopportune time. That stuff can just happen. But being turned on, that needs you to be present to happen. You need to be engaged in something/someone to feel it. You KNOW the difference.
Example:
text from the guy who likes you but you're not really feeling him that way:
Him: Good Morning Beautiful. I hope you have a great day!
Me: ::eye roll:: You too thanks
Text from guy you have an interest in:
Him: Hey
Me: omg omg omg omg omg omg omg - he texts the way we talk! SWOOOOON!!
That's being turned on! You are into this person.
I love love. It's great. In all forms. Everything from feverish crushes to smoldering lust, to a banked fire of endearment. Even if its just for a moment or forever. Just enjoy the hell out of each other.
xoSquared