I have to confess, as much as I prattle on about "getting your life" and "shining bright" and all that jazz, I sometimes get caught in the murky waters of another's insecurities. It happened to me this past weekend.
I played myself.
I let another woman's insecurity dim my light. I saw a friend this weekend (Josh) and he told me he had a "friend" who he was "dealing with" and that it was going good for the most part. I was excited for him, he showed me pictures and she was pretty and I was all for it. I don't care if its the crush stage, girlfriend stage, anything stage if you like the person and you and I are cool, then I'm happy for you and am going to welcome your new boo into the fold.
Let's call her Janice. Janice walked into the bar and had such a presence about her. She towered over everyone and looked so put together. Josh went to greet her and brought her in for an introduction. I looked in her eyes and her smile didn't reach them; she shook my hand like she was holding a dead fish. NAH!
I tried to follow up with pleasantries and she just wasn't having it. She wanted nothing to do with me.
Now, this is where I dimmed myself. I said: Self, don't make HER uncomfortable, let Josh and his lady rock. Don't encroach on their space, do your own thing. (Some background) Josh and I have know each other for centuries. Like awkward stages of life years. Our families are close, we've traveled together, we're tight. I fell back to ease a woman's ego when she didn't give me a fair chance. Because she spiraled in her mind, I didn't take the opportunity to make more memories with Josh because I was more concerned with Janice. I was more concerned about a relationship that doesn't exist.
Who the hell is Janice?!!
As she continued to be the salty ice queen she wanted to be, I thought, wait...You're too cute to be this mad! I look like I just got picked up from day camp and you're dressed to the nines and you're mad at me? I'm jet lagged and hungry but you out here giving me shade? No, nope, nah. It doesn't work like that. So you know what? Now, i'm going to give you cause. Now, i'm going to be that girl. Let's go all the way up!
I called my inner "Petty LaBelle" to the stage and let her SANG! As Josh drove me home, with a distrustful Janice (who insisted we drive 15 minutes in the opposite direction to her place so she could drop her car off because she didn't trust that I would be dropped off without incident) I proceeded to go down memory lane with Josh. Remember that time on the beach at 3 am? Remember that car ride? OMG Josh, we have to travel again! I love how you're always watching out for me. I miss us hanging out. When we pulled up to the destination I kissed him on the cheek and thanked him profusely for the ride. I turn to her and say: "Janice, if I never see you again.....Charmed." *Mic Drop* Janice was positively fuming and that's ok. Know why? Because you took my kindness for weakness, you sized me up and got the wrong measurements. There was no need for the distrust, but if I'm going to do the time, I might as well do the crime. Now sit there and be mad as my FRIEND and I talk about a life that doesn't include you. Sigh... Petty has left the building.
This was a long winded way of saying:
Sigh...
Just do you all the time! People will get mad at you either way. So you might as well have a good time and make the best out of every moment you have. Josh told me Janice had a major attitude after I got out of the car as we both laughed and laughed and laughed because at the end of the day. Girl bye!
xoSquared