Hello Friends! What ya’ll been up to?
Me? I’ve been hydrating and minding my own business :)
And you know what I’ve observed? You can’t care more about someone than they care about themselves. I wholly believe in reciprocity. I give what I get! But alas, even I forget to take my own advice and find myself emotionally ensnared into something that really has nothing to do with me.
Recently, a friend of mine was going through a rough patch. I invited them out to dinner, with the intention of a fun night of kiki and jokes and general merriment. From the very beginning, everything about the energy was off. I got a half-assed greeting and the restaurant had an hour wait. So we go to another spot and get seated immediately and my friend has two modes: silent or obnoxious. SIGH, so the conversation staggers along and it’s clear that I’ve made a mistake. I should have valued my time more. The only thing on my mind that could save this evening was the food; WRONG! My food was terrible, i couldn’t even finish it. I totally shut down. The person across from me is inhaling their food and being obnoxious and I’ve shut down in fear of saying something really malicious because honestly, I don’t want to hurt my friend’s feelings just as they didn’t want to hurt mine when instead of declining my invitation, they decided to “push through it”. So I declined dessert and made my way home. You know what was the most upsetting about that night? I had other plans that I canceled, to show my friend a little emotional support. There were people who really wanted to see me and I chose to be with someone who didn’t appreciate my presence at all.
So when I got home, I started thinking; “Why did I do this to myself? My time is way too precious to just give it out willy nilly”. So, I adopted: “Hyped or Home”
If I’m not absolutely hyped about doing something, going somewhere or seeing someone, then I’m not doing it, It’s that simple. I refuse to have my time wasted like that again. It was such a time and emotion suck AND I spent money on a shitty meal. Nope, we’re curtailing that, so if you’re not excited to see that person, cordially decline. Don’t feel like being mixy? Don’t mix. It’s just not worth the mental and emotional capacity! I’d rather be home, either Netflixing, reading a book or just taking a well deserved nap!
The weather seems to be breaking a bit and we’ve FINALLY gotten that extra hour of sunlight my soul needed to once again live! With the longer days and warmer weather comes more outings and social events. So what are we? We’re Hyped or We’re Home!
I want you to really take stock of what it is you want to do with your time. If it’s not serving your soul or giving you joy, do not waste your time on it. I want you to treat yourself like the precious currency you are.
Surround yourself with people who are excited to see you and value the time you’ve taken to be with them. Go to events that help you elevate yourself. Be it with new people, new topics, new ideas. Take stock of what it does to you. When you think of doing something: will you feel energized because of it? Does it excite you? Will you feel good about it when you go to bed that night? If it’s yes, then GO! If you find yourself feeling a little less than thrilled, just pass on the whole thing. It’s not worth it.
Especially when other people have taken time out of their schedules to see you. Don’t show up and let them know you’d rather be anywhere else. You won’t have to say it, your body language and energy will. Going through the motions is not cute. So be aware of the energy you’re putting out there!
I’ll keep you posted on how it goes for me; you’ll see me chilling at home or out in the streets but whichever it is, it’s me FULLY COMMITTED to being hyped about my surroundings and those I surround myself with.
Can you imagine if we all showed up to the same place really excited to be there. Not because of some celebrity or a special event but just because we really want to be in said location. Do you know how much fun that is? Yes you do. It’s that feeling you get when you’re with your best friend and you’re just gigging and enjoying each other’s company. So that….but ALL THE TIME! Let’s try it! Let’s be hyped or home and see how much of your sanity and your money you save. No more terrible dinners!